My Letter To Dan Turner

Dan Turner is the father to Brock Turner, the rapist who has been convicted on 3 felony counts of sexual assault for violating an unconscious young woman behind a dumpster. By now you’ve surely heard of this case as there is so much wrong with what’s happened.

I have a lot to say about it, but this post is limited to my response to Dan Turner’s letter to the court pleading for leniency for his son. If you haven’t read it, you should read it first.

Now for my response to Mr. Turner. Let’s start at the beginning, shall we?

Mr. Turner,

Your letter begins:

First of all, let me say that Brock is absolutely devastated by the events of
January 17th and 18th 2015. He would do anything to turn back the hands of time and
have that night to do over again. In many one-on one conversations with Brock since
that day, I can tell you that he is truly sorry for what occurred that night and for all
the pain and suffering that it has caused for all of those involved and impacted by
that night.

I see. Brock is devastated. No mention of the victim. And Brock is sorry for “what occurred” not “what he did”. Also, the “pain and suffering it has caused” not “he has caused”. Complete and utter refusal to put any responsibility on your son. But your son is devastated and sorry.

He has always been a person that people like to be around whether they are male or
female.

Relevance? Girls always like him.

I have never seen Brock raise his voice to anyone and he doesn't pre-judge anyone.

Interpretation: my son would never even raise his voice, much less assault anyone. He didn’t really do this.

You then go on to talk about what a hard worker he has always been, he always studied for spelling tests and worked hard at swimming, blah blah blah. How nice for Brock to have come from a two-parent household where both his parents were available to quiz him on his spelling, coach his sports teams, lead his scout troop and drive him to school. Many children don’t have that. It’s a shame in all that time together, you weren’t able to fit in any conversations about respecting women or consent.

Moving on.

Poor Brock comes home for what I’m sure was a lovely family Christmas, and tells you that he is having trouble fitting in socially. A problem faced by many college freshmen. He returns to school.

In hindsight, it's clear that Brock was desperately trying to fit in at Stanford
and fell into the culture of alcohol consumption and partying. This culture was
modeled by many of the upperclassmen on the swim team and played a role in the
events of Jan 17th and 18th 2015.

Your poor son was ill equipped to deal with the pressures of being away for college, so he drank and sexually assaulted an unconscious woman?? How can you even write this? Do you see the connection between your unwillingness to assign responsibility to your son for his criminal behavior and your son’s attitude toward women? Do you not realize that you yourself are enabling rape by acting as if it is in some way attributable to anything other than the rapist?

As it stands now, Brock's life has been deeply altered forever by the events of Jan
17th and 18th. He will never be his happy go lucky self with that easy going
personality and welcoming smile. His every waking minute is consumed with worry,
anxiety, fear, and depression.

Yes. Your son committed three felony acts of sexual assault. He was sexually gratifying himself with an unconscious woman. That did not happen because he was raised in the midwest and was too far from home. It did not happen because upperclassmen were drinking in front of him. It happened because your son is a rapist. Not being his happy go lucky self is the least of what he should be feeling. Again, no thought or mention of the victim.

These verdicts have broken and shattered him and our family in so many ways. His
life will never be the one that he dreamed about and worked so hard to achieve.

Neither will the victim’s.

He has no prior criminal history and has never been violent to anyone including his actions on the 
night of Jan 17th 2015.

I don’t even know what this means. He forced his fingers into her while she was unconscious. He was convicted of violating her with a foreign object. She was found unresponsive, yet her dress was pushed almost entirely off of her, and she had no underwear on. Are you saying those things are not violent? Because that is what you just said. You said he has never been violent to anyone, including that night. You could not make it more clear that you don’t believe your son did anything wrong. I wonder why he thought it was ok to do what he did.

Brock can do so many positive things as a contributor to society and is totally committed to 
educating other college age students about the dangers of alcohol consumption and
sexual promiscuity.

You’re still sticking to the alcohol thing. But now you’ve added “sexual promiscuity”. Just curious, who was promiscuous? Are you calling what Brock did “promiscuous” instead of “assault”? Or are you saying that the victim was promiscuous which is why this happened?

So much has been said about your idiotic “20 minutes of action” comment that I won’t even touch that one.

Mr. Turner, maybe the thing that surprised me most was learning that you have a daughter. At some point in the last 18 months, you must have put your own daughter in the victim’s shoes. You must have considered the ways in which you would have responded differently had your daughter been the victim and a stranger been the perpetrator.

I am a parent. I understand wanting to help your child. But you owe help to all you children. Your words perpetuate a culture that says rape is ok sometimes. If she drinks enough, it’s not really rape. If you’re a good enough kid, you shouldn’t be punished for a slip. If it’s the only time, it shouldn’t really count. Is that what your daughter deserves?

It’s not what mine deserve.

 

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